The Home®

The world's sexiest supermodel suggested that we start referring to our house and its occupants as The Home®. The home for what you might ask? Well depends on the day mostly. 2Pop and Biggie, my parentals, tried to relay the story of how they met to the Russian and I on Mother's Day. Both had graduated from college. My father a bit rowdy and my mother at an all girls college. They met working at a home for disturbed children. This is all the info I have ever gotten out of them. Apparently my father asked her out on a date and mother stayed in Montgomery for the weekend. I do not know where she would have been otherwise as details are slim. What was revealed is that they went out and went to the Holiday Inn Lounge. I am not judging as apparently this was the norm. What I am judging is that my mother told me that she "drank my father under the table." Soak that up. She sat down and ordered a Crown Royale (pronounced Roy-Al)on the rocks and he ordered a Tom Collins. Now many of my readers have never had or heard of a Tom Collins. It has been replaced by the much more popular Big Cat. I will try to graphically represent the difference between the two drinks.

Whiskey Neat
John "The Duke" Wayne

Tom Collins
Nathan "The Birdcage" Lane

If you have not seen The Birdcage recently, fix that. Also any John Wayne cowboy movie. This will help you understand how I view the disparity in their drink choices. I am not disparaging my father. I also am not saying that I am not proud of my mother. It worked out in the end and they are living happily ever after. The supermodel and I need to work on our story. Working with disturbed children leading to drinks at the Holiday Inn followed by mother having to drive him home. That is a story that we should all be jealous of.
Back to The Home®, I like this title and so I will be continuing to use it. Problems at The Home® this week include both cars being in the shop and one getting fixed, Stay Puft's keepers deciding to close up shop leaving us without a Godzilla Care Facility for the fall, and everyone trying to finish school. Guess which one has me up nights worried about the residents of The Home®. We should not worry about what we cannot change but I do. Its genetic. It will all work out and we will be fine but I will tell you this, I need more John Wayne in my life these days.