Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Summer Time

Well it starts this week. Finals were yesterday and I officially take over as Manny. Wilson (who I feel like needs a new pseudonym) and Mr. Fabulous are still in the thick of it at school. I feel like I should give a recap on the progeny by way of fun amusing anecdote each...

Wilson aka the worlds oldest man aka Benjamin Button aka Life Alert aka Family Safety Officer(nope still no good replacement. Taking suggestions)
Two weekends ago the boys dad became ill and we had the  boys unexpectedly and to prevent any disappointment I decided to drown them in decadence that Friday Night. The first stop on our tour of excellence was a trampoline gym call AirWalk. I pause to let you know that all of the orthopedists around town have condemned this place. Not a joke. Also, I tried to order two tickets before we left and the supermodel stopped me and said she would take care of it. When all was said and done we had three tickets. That supermodel is subtle about her desire to humiliate and break me.

On the way there I told them where we were headed and the first words out of his mouth were: "people get hurt there. Like bad." Bless his reasonable heart.
Wilson's Spirit Animal

Let me paint the picture. When the Spanish Orthodox Catholic Movement decides to bring back the inquisition like its 1478, they will hold the infidels here for their torture. Not to say that it wasn't fun but there is a three page wavier. After the waiver, living will and power of attorney are notarized you enter this large room divided into three parts. A large portion is wall to wall trampolines. Another portion with trampolines that launch you into foam pits similar to the garbage compactor from Star Wars. Finally a room dedicated to dodge ball on trampolines. Needless to say fun was had by all for around 45 minutes. Wilson then needed a sit down. After this was hot wings and cheese fries with P-Daddy and then an arcade. The next morning both he and Mr. Fabulous both claimed to be so tired that they couldn't play video games. I win (except for the soreness that lingered.)
Early version of what would become AirWalk

Mr. Fabulous.

He is going strong. Being awesome at everything (just ask him). The only thing that there is some debate about is his behavior in class. Admittedly I know its because he is bored and well ahead of other students but he better get used to it now that his stated goal is an Electrical Engineering degree from MIT. He questioned a friend of ours who he found out did just that about the schools in Boston. The gentleman was confused and Thomas told him that he wanted his children to go to good schools. He is a planner like his brother.

I digress. Behavior. The teacher was apparently struggling to keep control of her classroom and has tried 3 or 4 different reward/demerit systems this school year. New system: divide the class into tables and let them compete to win prizes as a group. Your group receives  a "X" for poor behavior and a "check" for good. As soon as this was announced (according to Mr. Fabulous) he immediately volunteered to be his own team and move his desk next to the teachers. He didn't want to cause any other team to lose. How very altruistic. That sums up his status in a nut shell.
Mr. Fabulous would start an
argument just to win it. 

El Fox

My girl is growing up. Talking is coming along. She loves everyone now and want hugs and kisses all the time. She is two now and I can't say that I am likely to remember this year as her brother is a bit of an attention seeker. I will say that the fox is as sweet and perfect as anyone in the world and I am smitten and will do whatever she tells me to. UpDown(oatmeal) every morning? Yes ma'am with extra cinnamon and sugar just because you are mine. I am biased. Mostly, because she is potty training herself. Parents are the worst about over sharing bathroom humor so I will avoid it.

Now I may have rushed her so that we can have a talk about mr. the king aka LGA aka lil reezy aka jack jack.

My new bundle of joy
I don't know what a holy terror would look or sound like. I don't know what colic is. He is neither a terror nor does he have colic. He does however have a screaming issue. Well I have an issue with his screaming. I think we have isolated the cause of it. His mother's dairy consumption. Problem with that is her food pyramid.

Dairy sits at the bottom. Then Carbs. Then sugars. Then Conecuh Sausage. The top, which was full of fruits and vegetables, has been shot off like the sphinx's nose. Never to be seen again. She has valiently tried to cut back on dairy. Give it up cold turkey?! including half and half?! you can forget it. I prefer Mr. The King screaming over her screaming. He doesn't get mad when I ignore him. So, we are tapering/rationing.

Although delicious, it will never be a replacement for
Half and Half first thing in the morning
 with a splash of coffee

This is how my morning started. Apparently mom had milk with her waffles last night


Now? Best Manny Ever

That's us. The American Dream.